I read for a modern film adaptation for Alice In Wonderland today.
Parts I need you to picture me in:
Cheshire Cat
Caterpillar
Mad Hatter
and...
They want to cast a drag queen as
Queen of Hearts
OFF WITH HER HEAD!
Friday, March 20, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Heartgasms <*POW*3
A Gift From Me To You
It's currently 4:39:18 AM and I can't sleep.
For once, it's not for the usual reasons that I can't normally find my way to Little Nemo's favorite adventure place.
I'm kept awake by memories. Happy ones... Actually, happy is too bland a word for these memories. Pure. Heart-filling. Life-changing. "Heartgasm" is the best term I can make up in order to express the orgy of joy currently running rampant from my chest to the tips of every finger, out my feet and bursting forth from the tippy top of my noggin.
It would be far too long of an essay for me to explain each memory. So, I've decided to make a list... Almost an acceptance speech, if you will. If you won't? Fuck off. It's my heartgasm. Not yours.
I would like to thank...
A certain lady for writing the brilliant and humbling "Shucked," allowing my lifelong dream to star in a play on 42nd Street come true.
A certain gentleman and two certain ladies for trusting me to carry their vision all the way to my first acceptance speech.
A certain lady for days and nights full of bubbles and colors and balance.
A certain gentleman for making me nervous event though he has no idea I exist.
A certain gentleman for reminding me that I AM worth it.
A certain Goddess for the basic necessities and beyond.
A certain lady for a certain song of which my rewrite is almost finished and will make me FAMOUS!
A certain city for immediately welcoming me and currently missing me.
A certain city for constantly reminding me that my time there wasn't wasted.
A certain city for always causing internal battles about where happy should be.
A certain city for holding something for me, something to be discovered when I arrive.
A certain lady for thanking me for her strength and helping me realize that I am, too, strong.
A certain community for making me feel like a star.
A certain community for making a certain alter-ego a star.
A certain gentleman for helping me see that no one really knows it all and afraid sometimes trumps logical.
A certain force that protects and prevails over the bullshit and regrettable.
A certain Universe that gives me everything I ask for, in abundance.
A certain self.
Pick a number 1-100.
Grab your favorite book off the shelf.
Turn to that page.
What are the first words you read?
That's my thanks to you.
=) I'm sure it makes sense.
I love you, all.
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU
I hope you can feel this. It feels good.
It's currently 4:39:18 AM and I can't sleep.
For once, it's not for the usual reasons that I can't normally find my way to Little Nemo's favorite adventure place.
I'm kept awake by memories. Happy ones... Actually, happy is too bland a word for these memories. Pure. Heart-filling. Life-changing. "Heartgasm" is the best term I can make up in order to express the orgy of joy currently running rampant from my chest to the tips of every finger, out my feet and bursting forth from the tippy top of my noggin.
It would be far too long of an essay for me to explain each memory. So, I've decided to make a list... Almost an acceptance speech, if you will. If you won't? Fuck off. It's my heartgasm. Not yours.
I would like to thank...
A certain lady for writing the brilliant and humbling "Shucked," allowing my lifelong dream to star in a play on 42nd Street come true.
A certain gentleman and two certain ladies for trusting me to carry their vision all the way to my first acceptance speech.
A certain lady for days and nights full of bubbles and colors and balance.
A certain gentleman for making me nervous event though he has no idea I exist.
A certain gentleman for reminding me that I AM worth it.
A certain Goddess for the basic necessities and beyond.
A certain lady for a certain song of which my rewrite is almost finished and will make me FAMOUS!
A certain city for immediately welcoming me and currently missing me.
A certain city for constantly reminding me that my time there wasn't wasted.
A certain city for always causing internal battles about where happy should be.
A certain city for holding something for me, something to be discovered when I arrive.
A certain lady for thanking me for her strength and helping me realize that I am, too, strong.
A certain community for making me feel like a star.
A certain community for making a certain alter-ego a star.
A certain gentleman for helping me see that no one really knows it all and afraid sometimes trumps logical.
A certain force that protects and prevails over the bullshit and regrettable.
A certain Universe that gives me everything I ask for, in abundance.
A certain self.
Pick a number 1-100.
Grab your favorite book off the shelf.
Turn to that page.
What are the first words you read?
That's my thanks to you.
=) I'm sure it makes sense.
I love you, all.
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU
I hope you can feel this. It feels good.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
EnErGy
It's been five days since I left Chicago and five days since I've had any strange and unusual substances in my system. It's strange and unusual how my sleep patterns vary from all day to up all night to up constipated to up eating ice cream.
I feel these strange surges of energy that fell as thought they are being topped off by something, like a lid has been placed over the little energy bug to keep it in the jar until it's little tail light goes dim, rendering it fecal energy matter. How do I get that energy out of the jar and into productive use?
I need help unscrewing the lid and letting little lightning bugs in my brain go freeeeeeeeeeeeeee...
Monday, January 26, 2009
Choose Your Own Adventure
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (12:30A.M.) I finish work, speak to a friend on the phone and the decision is made.
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (2:15A.M.) After rushing around, packing, my cab arrives.
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (3:47A.M.) Delay.
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (4:30A.M.) Delay.
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (5:00A.M.) I, finally, board the train and proceed to sleep.
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (11:32A.M.) The train arrives at it's final destination.
Union Station, Chicago, IL, USA
I've never done anything quite this drastic before. Uprooting so quickly, on a whim, and heading out of town to a city that I've only visited twice to stay with a friend of a friend and pray something work-wise will materialize soon... Soon enough that I don't overstay my welcome in my friend of a friend's apartment and can move into someplace else.
I pull out all the stops: posting on craigslist for a room to rent for $50-$100 a week, even asking if anyone needs a housesitter... Desperate times.
Monday January 26, 2009 (2:10A.M) Still keeping positive that things will work out. Starting to feel as if, maybe, I've reached beyond Friend Of Friend's comfort zone and need to go. I've been very respectful, I keep my things in the corner of one room (a backpack and a small suitcase,) I clean the bathroom every time I take a shower, I try to pick up around the place whenever I see it slightly out of order and, frankly, just try to stay as invisible as possible. I understand, however, that sometimes people just need their space, free of any foreign objects... Including runaways from Cleveland, Ohio.
Luckily, I met someone today who has a room he may be willing to let me use for a one or two weeks. Cowboy Brian seems like a genuine guy, constantly playing the host, never speaking ill of anyone., taking care of those who need it.
I hope my ride on this underground rainbow road doesn't end soon. I'm kind of enjoying my adventure. It is slightly unsettling not knowing what comes next. At any moment I could be in a cab on my way to the Amtrak... Back to Cleveland.
I'm so close to breaking past IL and to all of the other states beyond... States I have never seen (except a weekend in California) and would really like to explore. There are times I wish our society was still as it was years ago, when a traveling man could hitchhike his way across the U.S. and stop at farms, offering assistance in return for a hot meal and a place in the barn to hang his hat for the night. Now, there are just too many forms and required ID's and suspicious people for anything like that to happen.
So, keep faith. I am. I will accomplish what I've set out to do. It's sort of like my own reality show, my own survivor.
Survivor: United States of America.
Stay tuned for the next episode.... It's bound to be an exciting season.
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (2:15A.M.) After rushing around, packing, my cab arrives.
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (3:47A.M.) Delay.
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (4:30A.M.) Delay.
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (5:00A.M.) I, finally, board the train and proceed to sleep.
Wednesday January 21, 2009 (11:32A.M.) The train arrives at it's final destination.
Union Station, Chicago, IL, USA
I've never done anything quite this drastic before. Uprooting so quickly, on a whim, and heading out of town to a city that I've only visited twice to stay with a friend of a friend and pray something work-wise will materialize soon... Soon enough that I don't overstay my welcome in my friend of a friend's apartment and can move into someplace else.
I pull out all the stops: posting on craigslist for a room to rent for $50-$100 a week, even asking if anyone needs a housesitter... Desperate times.
Monday January 26, 2009 (2:10A.M) Still keeping positive that things will work out. Starting to feel as if, maybe, I've reached beyond Friend Of Friend's comfort zone and need to go. I've been very respectful, I keep my things in the corner of one room (a backpack and a small suitcase,) I clean the bathroom every time I take a shower, I try to pick up around the place whenever I see it slightly out of order and, frankly, just try to stay as invisible as possible. I understand, however, that sometimes people just need their space, free of any foreign objects... Including runaways from Cleveland, Ohio.
Luckily, I met someone today who has a room he may be willing to let me use for a one or two weeks. Cowboy Brian seems like a genuine guy, constantly playing the host, never speaking ill of anyone., taking care of those who need it.
I hope my ride on this underground rainbow road doesn't end soon. I'm kind of enjoying my adventure. It is slightly unsettling not knowing what comes next. At any moment I could be in a cab on my way to the Amtrak... Back to Cleveland.
I'm so close to breaking past IL and to all of the other states beyond... States I have never seen (except a weekend in California) and would really like to explore. There are times I wish our society was still as it was years ago, when a traveling man could hitchhike his way across the U.S. and stop at farms, offering assistance in return for a hot meal and a place in the barn to hang his hat for the night. Now, there are just too many forms and required ID's and suspicious people for anything like that to happen.
So, keep faith. I am. I will accomplish what I've set out to do. It's sort of like my own reality show, my own survivor.
Survivor: United States of America.
Stay tuned for the next episode.... It's bound to be an exciting season.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
The Brink Of Thirty
I've officially been twenty-nine years old for one day.
To me, this is when the new year actually begins. I wasn't born January 1st. Therefor, the new year doesn't begin until my new year begins. So, right now is the start of my new year. My 2009. My 29.
Over the past few years I've had my up's and my down's. I've been through my own trials and errors and successes. I've had my problems. I've kept my promises. I've had my heart broken and I'm sure I've broken some hearts. I've learned to trust and I've trusted too much. I've broken trust and some have lost my trust in them. I'm still lonely. Yet, I'm surrounded by people who love me dearly.
All I know for certain is this: Everything I have done, am doing or will do, is mine.
In twenty-nine years, I have learned one important lesson: As dark as the path ahead may be, it's still my path to light.
I accept, love and hold myself completely responsible for every experience I haved had.
I now sit here, in Cleveland, Ohio. I'm supposed to be back in Manhattan. Plans change. Life goes on.
Here's to 29 more.
"It's hard to find people who will love you no matter what..."
To me, this is when the new year actually begins. I wasn't born January 1st. Therefor, the new year doesn't begin until my new year begins. So, right now is the start of my new year. My 2009. My 29.
Over the past few years I've had my up's and my down's. I've been through my own trials and errors and successes. I've had my problems. I've kept my promises. I've had my heart broken and I'm sure I've broken some hearts. I've learned to trust and I've trusted too much. I've broken trust and some have lost my trust in them. I'm still lonely. Yet, I'm surrounded by people who love me dearly.
All I know for certain is this: Everything I have done, am doing or will do, is mine.
In twenty-nine years, I have learned one important lesson: As dark as the path ahead may be, it's still my path to light.
I accept, love and hold myself completely responsible for every experience I haved had.
I now sit here, in Cleveland, Ohio. I'm supposed to be back in Manhattan. Plans change. Life goes on.
Here's to 29 more.
"It's hard to find people who will love you no matter what..."
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